Here I’m again, laying in my basement, start something never well-known blog about some movie with my broken English.
Just a digression, all the films I have written in my blog are the ones I really like and appreciate, the ones once opened a window for me to glimpse at a different perspective, a new insights, or simply clearing out a realization of ourselves. For that sense I really enjoy this passive activity, and movie itself grows from all the passiveness and becomes a social mirror, a self-reflection, it gradually stimulates an active thinking process.
Going back to the movie Take This Waltz, it’s a female driven film that was directed by Sarah Polley back in 2012. She delivers a female psychological film that at the same time unfolds a sentimental story surrounding with female emotions – the portrait of a modern women emotionally struggling in love, boredom, longing for new excitement and attention, and experiencing the same cycle again.
We as females all get it. It’s almost like a beautiful dream that you don’t mind repeat it many times because of it’s sweet, colorful, and exciting at the same time, and because it’s a dream, which might confuse your sense of reality, you start to question your own sensations that made out from many “unsyncing” segments in your life, and it further allures you to take actions toward those dreams.
When you think that you break the circle of your life, the boredom you had been in, it really just another fresh start of a new circle, another form of same kind of boredom. You are you, the sensations are with you the whole time and the feelings built up creates a little road for you to get out, but it may be illusionary because feelings is not solid, it’s like ocean moving toward different directions.
“In the big picture, life has gap in it. It just does. You don’t go crazy trying to fill it up like a lunatic.” A final conversation Geraldine has with Margot, two wandering girls who are lost in their sensations. We are alike.
As women, we question ourselves consistently. The doubt of our own existence in this male driven society, combining with the desire for new experience, the wanting to escape from the boredom we once encountered or created by ourselves. We create many pretty subjects in our mind, and we try to lure ourselves into thinking that our imagination is real and it will get better if we take action to change. At the end upon we taking many actions as we wanted to, it’s about us, it’s never about another man. They are just props that help us escape, to fill up the gap in life, to compose our imaginative picture of idealism, our circling emotions we are trapped in.
As females our feelings are the things we worship, our sentimental state is pretty much the direction determining where we heading to each day. Differentiate from men, who tends to have better sense separating objective things from subjective feelings, or should say their perception of things is somewhat solid while female’s is moveable. They tend to stick with the events while we stick with our flowing sensations and imagination. Like Lou emphasizes toward the end about the past sticks with the current while Margot’s emotions changing direction and like water moving and waving back and forth following the winds and inevitable vortex that is born attaching to the nature of water.
Toward the end of the film, Margot is all by herself swinging and rotating in a dream-like playground, repeating the same circle that she was once at, with someone, and now by herself, a final realization of gap is inevitable in life, and filling up with it won’t change the fact of its existence. It won’t change the fact that we are alone while choosing a different path, with our perception of what’s opening up for us on the road, but it might be deceptive. The difference of each path is we picking the one who sits beside us, the unchanging part is the action of picking, determined by our own desire and unsatisfied emotions and the same lure we set up ourselves for.
It’s a simple movie with rich sentimental taste of it, more toward female viewers, to unfold what’s in their mind, what’s bothering in their modern life, what their feelings are made out of, what kind of circle they get into.
The 360 degree swinging camera helps deliver the portrait of rotating the again-and-again dream-like sensations, the slow repetition which once was beautiful and once trapped you into thinking it will never stop, and it really won’t if you follow it and swing around with it.
At the final scene Margot closes her eyes, smiling, and maybe with tears. Realizing circling in dream is about obsession. Obsessed with something new, something that will become old and boring the next day. When “I love you” becomes mandatory daily routine, she might do it again, or regret of acting on it, but it won’t change the fact that it’s swinging.
Women with the most complicated feelings toward themselves, their emotions are unstoppable flowing and sometime it’s moving nowhere.